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Masturbation truths

Madam Tracey

Cyclone Langtrees
Staff member
Legend Member
Points
25
But sometimes having someone to help makes it that much better!

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While you are down there ...What do you think of my new pearly knickers?
 

Zeus

Patron Saint of Werewolves
Diamond Member
Points
0
Evita Maxwell wrote...For starters: Masturbation will not cause hairy palms, it won’t make your penis fall off and it certainly won’t make you infertile

Well that's nothing. As recently as the 1990s, Abd al-Aziz bin Baz, the Grand Mufti of Saudi Arabia, argued masturbation causes disruption of the digestive system, inflammation of the testicles, damage to the spine, "trembling and instability in some parts of the body like the feet", weakening of the "cerebral glands" leading to decreased intellect and even "mental disorders and insanity".

Now that's a concern :D
 

Dallas

Legend Member
Points
0
Grand Mufti....more like grand Muppet. Well I guess they will just have to wait for all those virgins in heaven...
Maybe that is why so many terrorists are so keen to get there.

I don't think they read the fine print, there are a lot of virgins who are overweight male video game addicts with a colostomy bag and a penchant for eating large quantities of chips from Aldi and not washing :rolleyes:
 

Happy2

Legend Member
Points
22
Should be Grand Muff Pet....what do you think HP?
Surely a muff conjures the vision of fur
And ladies now prefer to bring in the contractors and be shorn ( I can shear without hacking away to much flesh by the way ladies, if this service is required And always have a big bucket of molten tar to fix any slip ups) So a Muff Pet as a title for our beloved HP does not seem appropriate
 

Madam Tracey

Cyclone Langtrees
Staff member
Legend Member
Points
25
MUFF a tube made of fur or other warm material into which the hands are placed for warmth.

Yup....that pretty much sums it up
FLUFFY MUFFY.....GRAND FLUFTI MUFTI....(EVERY MOSLEM WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ONE!)
 

Madam Tracey

Cyclone Langtrees
Staff member
Legend Member
Points
25
MUFF DIVER (Urban Dictionary)
To suck pussy, eat out, lick the cat, eat the beaver. When a man or woman ( i prefer men)buries their face in a woman's hairy or bald pussy and licks her clit with random sucking here and there. A good muff diver knows to focus on the clit and suck and lick it until the woman explodes into a throbbing, wiggling ecstasy. Licking the vaginal opening and sucking on the lips occasionally is a big plus. You can take it a step further and lick the asshole to complete the mission.
 

Dallas

Legend Member
Points
0
MUFF DIVER (Urban Dictionary)
To suck pussy, eat out, lick the cat, eat the beaver. When a man or woman ( i prefer men)buries their face in a woman's hairy or bald pussy and licks her clit with random sucking here and there. A good muff diver knows to focus on the clit and suck and lick it until the woman explodes into a throbbing, wiggling ecstasy. Licking the vaginal opening and sucking on the lips occasionally is a big plus. You can take it a step further and lick the asshole to complete the mission.

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