What is the funniest thing a sex worker has said to you ?

[thisiswhatiget]

After being told I was about to receive a prostate massage and never experiencing one before.
me: Is it going to hurt?
her: What a stupid question. I've never heard such a stupid question before.

 

[Channelle]

Not funny at the time, bit of language issue.
Booked an AMP appointment direct with lady, said I'd "be there the second you open".
Snapped back at me, "none of your business who I see first, nothing to do with you".

 

[dengis]

GG Korean Emma.
On my first visit called me ‘Mr Stamina’ and on each return visit during doggy and say ‘I remember you now! Mr Stamina!!”

Lol, same

 

[SilentBoob]

Lol, same

Oh no!
I’m not special

 

[Thick meat]

A certain lady who used to work at Cantik said to me..
“I really want you in my ass but it won’t fit”

 

[MojitoSundowner]

A certain lady who used to work at Cantik said to me..
“I really want you in my ass but it won’t fit”

Anything will fit if you push hard enough

 

[Channelle]

Not funny at the time, bit of language issue.
Booked an AMP appointment direct with lady, said I'd "be there the second you open".
Snapped back at me, "none of your business who I see first, nothing to do with you".

Posted my language issue # 2 previously, and was at the flip stage of a very nice massage.
Of course things had hardened significantly at that stage, so acted really surprised and tried to make a little joke about it -
"whoops, sorry, oh where did that come from?"
She replied - "from Taiwan, from Taiwan, from Taiwan".

 

[Isabellagarcia]

We need a thread titled " what is the funniest thing a client has said to you " you would get a very good laugh

 

[WildBrumby]

We need a thread titled " what is the funniest thing a client has said to you " you would get a very good laugh

Start a new thread Isabellagarcia, I did a quick search and doesn't appear to be one for "Funny things clients have said". Be great to read from the ladies here.

 

[Isabellagarcia]

Start a new thread Isabellagarcia, I did a quick search and doesn't appear to be one for "Funny things clients have said". Be great to read from the ladies here.

Okay I will do so in a moment. Get the tissues ready... somethings down right creepy & somethings incredibly funny

 

[Tippletopster]

It was a few years ago, and was in a bit of a slum and had some weight around my belly.
So a good 40 minutes in out of breath and blown my load laying back cuddling the wonderful lady which was nice and she out of nowhere pats my belly and says “happy daddy all sleepy with his little baby belly”.
I to this day use that as motivation to eat better and train regularly

 

[Isabellagarcia]

It was a few years ago, and was in a bit of a slum and had some weight around my belly.
So a good 40 minutes in out of breath and blown my load laying back cuddling the wonderful lady which was nice and she out of nowhere pats my belly and says “happy daddy all sleepy with his little baby belly”.
I to this day use that as motivation to eat better and train regularly

I am laughing out loud hahahahahha, now that's all the motivation and kick up the ass any human would need

 

[Skankpunt23]

“Why you not cum yet? Is your dick broken?”

Bet you were only like 3 minutes in lol Asian WL man. I don't know why people even bother

 

[Lukey]

Bet you were only like 3 minutes in lol Asian WL man. I don't know why people even bother

Some can be like that yeah.

In this case I was fucking 2 ladies (both Asian). One of em clearly thought I’d had enough fun!

 

[SausageMan]

Was about to get a massage in Sydney in my younger days from a busty blonde. Took my strides off and she said ’oh thank goodness. The big ones make my hands ache‘. Well gee. Thanks.

 

[Dood Deleted 66783]

She: Who are you going to impress with that!!??
Customer grinning: Me!

 

[Goodstuff36 Bon truc in french]

She: Who are you going to impress with that!!??
Customer grinning: Me!

Reminds me when I was taking a piss at the zoo and the elephant stuck its head over the fence and said how do you breathe through that little thing.

 

[Chief]

Reminds me when I was taking a piss at the zoo and the elephant stuck its head over the fence and said how do you breathe through that little thing.

A lady comes running into the doctor bleeding. What happened? I just went out with an elephant. The doctor said”but they have a little penis! The lady replied “he fingered me first!