Christyne,
I've found your postings totally fascinating and wonderful. I'm just a little sad to notice a fall off in postings since last September., so I hope I can 'rev it up' abit by sharing a little of my story.
I'm totally blind, have no partner and getting on a bit in years now. But neither lack of sight nor my age have diminished my sex drive, my need for intimacy nor my interest and delight in bringing a woman to full ongoing orgasm/s. In fact I feel that my loss of visual contact with women has hugely increased my hunger for tactile contact and intimacy.
Yet, despite my "horny as a Hoot Owl" disposition, I seem to be unusual amongst the sight-impaired community. Other blind men seem not to have a sex drive nor to notice the loss of sexual expression in their lives.
The famous Viennese Psychiatrist, Sigmund Freud, equated blindness with a psychological phenomena he called the castration complex. By this he seemed to be referring to a generalised feeling of powerlessness, inneffectualness and an impotence to make things happen, but I wonder if in many blind men this actually goes on to be a loss of sex drive and a loss of sexual arousal? I don't know the answer, as no blind man of my acquaintance will ever talk with me about anything sexual, they seem totally closed off from any interest in the topic. There are, of course, many married blind people who have children, so some of them are getting into it.
Nevertheless, despite some being married with children, any talk of anything sexual around blind people or blindness welfare agencies seems an absolute no no taboo! There seems to be a deeply held unstated belief that blind people, perhaps all disabled people, should not be sexual. But me? Well, I just love it, adore it and can never get enough!
Not getting enough and largely being disallowed from talking about it goes to the heart of my own situation. The fact is that I have no partner with whom to share my intimacy needs, and this feels very isolating, lonely, hurtful and even damaging.
There's a deep human need to look at and to take into one's soul things of beauty, whether that be the beauty of Nature's landscapes, the beauty of creative Arts or the beauty of another human person. Sight allows the observer to visually take in, to visually touch and to capture in memory the beauty and/or the sexual desirability of another person, even a total stranger. All of us have, at some time, become aware of somebody visually touching us. To be stared at in a critical or judgemental manner is highly uncomfortable, but at some other times, it can be highly pleasurable to be visually touched by another person if their gaze is admiring warm or friendly. But, for me since age 27, this is all lost to me. My only compensating sensory facultys are physical touch, smell, taste and sound.
I adore and hunger for the smell of a woman, a woman's touch, a woman's taste and the warm sounds of a woman's voice speaking or gently moaning in pleasure close to my ear!
John
