How to deal with being outed to your neighbors

[Lucy Lake]

Hello Forum Friends!

Lucy here, with a real doozy.

Upon my arrival home to NSW from three weeks away, I set about cleaning my house. My beloved friend, a WL, came around to see me. She told me she had been working privately and had stashed her hooker bag in my laundry (which has an outdoor entrance). I took it out for her and as we talked, the bag started to ring.

I said to her, did you forget to turn your phone off???

We looked at each other with pained expressions and continued on our merry way. When my neighbor arrived home from work in the evening, she knocked on my back door and proceeded to tell me how she found a bag with condoms, lube, a phone and a receipt for a hotel (with my friends name and address on it). I feigned ignorance and had a bit of a chuckle. She said her and her mother had gone through the bag after hearing it ring ALL WEEKEND.

Then she said, "I called the real estate" and I asked her why, my heart sank as I realised we not only have the same real estate but also the same real estate agent. I said perhaps it was a friend of the girl who used to live here.

Needless to say, I was mortified and told her about how the girl who used to live here had her washing machine stolen from the same laundry, and that calling the real estate was a good idea, as the laundry door clearly needed a lock on it. She said "i'm going to call the real estate again". At this time my phone rang and I excused myself to answer it.

I live in a one horse town (although it does protest and call itself a city) and the people here are extremely narrow minded, nosey and tend to gossip. Any advice on coping with the potential fallout of this situation would be greatly appreciated!!!!!!!

 

[HappyPirate]

Ahoy; - Hmmm nice dilemma, trying to avoid gossip in a small town is very difficult, but the situation is not lost. Adapt the first golden rule and apply it, which is;- deny-deny-deny tell anyone that approaches you that it’s not your bag. Now the good thing about a small town, it will not be long before new gossip occurs and yours will be forgotten in a short time period.
This is a case of telling a white lie is better than telling the truth and if you need to dispose of the bag and its contents do so.
Cheers and all the best in your endeavours

 

[Tania Admin]

I agree, Deny, Deny, Deny. It didn't have your name on it tell them it's a friend's and none of their business.
And who does your neighbour think she is entering your home and going through ANYTHING! Personally I would have called the police on her.
Hold your head high and deny, laugh it off and make your neighbour out to be the nosy nutcase she obviously is, then drop it,,small towns soon find a victim who is reacting and if you don't react they will just move onto their next poor victim.

 

[johnlou]

yeppers i am with the last 2 posts and you can also thank the lady next door and then ask her not to violate your privacy by entering your abode even if the laundry door was open . for what ever happens in your unit / house is not their business . this is trespassing on their behalf .i hope you are able to steer them off of your tracks

 

[homer]

I'd tell the neighbor to bugger off and mind their own business. That's invasion of privacy.
Condom and lube are for protection.

 

[johnlou]

I'd tell the neighbor to bugger off and mind their own business. That's invasion of privacy.
Condom and lube are for protection.

yeppers , what you should is ask the neighbor to empty her handbag out for you to view and see what she carries around with her and start the rag on her for doing so

better still ask her why so many people come around to her place of abode , especially when she is not home . and look for her reactions , ( who cares if it is true or not ) think of stuff like this , put her on the defense and she will forget about you and the bag she had no reason looking into .

 

[bushseeker]

Sorry im notgetting it
How did she have the bag but then it was where it was left?

And why is she calling the real estate?
Condoms and lube are normal items.
Why not just tell her the pair of you have extremely active sex lives

 

[sunyun]

I am with Happypriate.

Deny Deny Deny.

But I wouldn't be telling her to mind her own business, etc. You need her on your side, not against you !

Tell her you know nothing about it, and it has obviously been dumped by someone in trouble, and you have now dumped it at the tip.

You may wish to tell her that you want to move on, because the thought of people dumping stuff in your house makes you uncomfortable. You don't want to go to the Police or anything - you just want the whole thing to go away (which is mostly the truth !).

Don't ever refer to the incident again.

Wait for the local church caretaker to be caught drinking the alter wine or whatever ! Gives them something to talk about.

Best of luck.

 

[Lucy Lake]

All good advice. I have avoided her since and am not going to bring it up with her.

 

[johnlou]

All good advice. I have avoided her since and am not going to bring it up with her.

put it behind you and move forward , if your neighbor brings it up again then you will be able to deal with it without hesitation

 

[homer]

if she asks again, just tell her that was your vibrator ringing, it was trying to phone home.

 

[johnlou]

if she asks again, just tell her that was your vibrator ringing, it was trying to phone home.

lol like ET

 

[TheRoamingEyeball]

I am with Happypriate.

Deny Deny Deny.

But I wouldn't be telling her to mind her own business, etc. You need her on your side, not against you !

Tell her you know nothing about it, and it has obviously been dumped by someone in trouble, and you have now dumped it at the tip.

You may wish to tell her that you want to move on, because the thought of people dumping stuff in your house makes you uncomfortable. You don't want to go to the Police or anything - you just want the whole thing to go away (which is mostly the truth !).

Don't ever refer to the incident again.

Wait for the local church caretaker to be caught drinking the alter wine or whatever ! Gives them something to talk about.

Best of luck.

Definitely agree with this! Along with the gist of the other comments

 

[Ginger Spice]

I am feeling your pain right now. My neighbour came over, talked nicely to me before I left to do shopping. When I arrived home she came barging from the shed, demanding to know what my problem is. I was obviously confused. She was telling me I act all sweet and innocent and I crack the sh*ts every time she comes over. (may I remind you she was in my home). She told me she knows what I do for work and I should be ashamed of myself. Now I'm not one to argue, but she is in my home. I yelled for my housemate, and my housemate (who no doubt told her) got her to leave... This ended in me quite upset, and to make things worse... She called the police on a domestic dispute she caused....

They rocked up, saw me in tears, spoke to her, where she was clearly drunk. Then told me they think she was pulling the piss.... So now I have one neighbour who knows what I do, and others who probably think I'm a criminal for seeing the police out the front of mine.

hope it all works out for you xx

 

[HappyPirate]

Ahoy Ginger, Hold your head up high and deny, laugh it off and make your neighbour out to be the nosy nutcase she obviously is, it soon will be forgotten. The world is full of nutters and your neighbour is one of them.
Cheers

I am feeling your pain right now. My neighbour came over, talked nicely to me before I left to do shopping. When I arrived home she came barging from the shed, demanding to know what my problem is. I was obviously confused. She was telling me I act all sweet and innocent and I crack the sh*ts every time she comes over. (may I remind you she was in my home). She told me she knows what I do for work and I should be ashamed of myself. Now I'm not one to argue, but she is in my home. I yelled for my housemate, and my housemate (who no doubt told her) got her to leave... This ended in me quite upset, and to make things worse... She called the police on a domestic dispute she caused....

They rocked up, saw me in tears, spoke to her, where she was clearly drunk. Then told me they think she was pulling the piss.... So now I have one neighbour who knows what I do, and others who probably think I'm a criminal for seeing the police out the front of mine.

hope it all works out for you xx

 

[homer]

I am feeling your pain right now. My neighbour came over, talked nicely to me before I left to do shopping. When I arrived home she came barging from the shed, demanding to know what my problem is. I was obviously confused. She was telling me I act all sweet and innocent and I crack the sh*ts every time she comes over. (may I remind you she was in my home). She told me she knows what I do for work and I should be ashamed of myself. Now I'm not one to argue, but she is in my home. I yelled for my housemate, and my housemate (who no doubt told her) got her to leave... This ended in me quite upset, and to make things worse... She called the police on a domestic dispute she caused....

They rocked up, saw me in tears, spoke to her, where she was clearly drunk. Then told me they think she was pulling the piss.... So now I have one neighbour who knows what I do, and others who probably think I'm a criminal for seeing the police out the front of mine.

hope it all works out for you xx

You can tell her your a professional cock groomer or your the commander in chief for HMAS CockadoodleDoo, Seamen go on shore leave whenever your in charge. Your the Erector, assisting whenever required to put up them poles one at a time.

I reckon she's just jealous, being the pole master that you are. Neighbour like this worth ignoring.

 

[Ginger Spice]

You can tell her your a professional cock groomer or your the commander in chief for HMAS CockadoodleDoo, Seamen go on shore leave whenever your in charge. Your the Erector, assisting whenever required to put up them poles one at a time.

I reckon she's just jealous, being the pole master that you are. Neighbour like this worth ignoring.

I'm moving house soon anyway, getting away from the mess my ex house mate has made... With a few of my neighbours.When I was on night shift, she would blast the music at ridiculous hours, getting noise complaints from the police, only reason I found out was a random she had over slipped up..

 

[DDxoxo]

What's wrong with nosy neighbours ?
Obviously they don't have real friends real lives of their own that they have to interfere in yours !!!

Live & let live -- we aren't all prefect
(But some people live the dillusional lives & think they are!!)
We'll let them be like that
Ignore them
Their self centred -ness will be their undoing !!!

 

[TheRoamingEyeball]

What's wrong with nosy neighbours ?
Obviously they don't have real friends real lives of their own that they have to interfere in yours !!!

Live & let live -- we aren't all prefect
(But some people live the dillusional lives & think they are!!)
We'll let them be like that
Ignore them
Their self centred -ness will be their undoing !!!

Aha! Spot on. It's weird when you encounter someone who clearly thinks they are the only real player in this game of life, but hilarious when they get annoyed that they actually don't matter to everyone who lays eyes on them. How dare they, I know!

 

[sunyun]

Aha! Spot on. It's weird when you encounter someone who clearly thinks they are the only real player in this game of life, but hilarious when they get annoyed that they actually don't matter to everyone who lays eyes on them. How dare they, I know!

The problem is that even though they don't really matter, they can still give you a lot of grief.

 

[wr3xr]

Exactly.. they can cause you a world of grief. If you rent, you might as well move. If you're private, it only takes a neighbour to go record a few regos and it turns sour very quickly.

Heres the opposite though. When I lived with my parents I called a wl who gave me the details of my small suburban street. Turns out she was only 3 doors up and I knew her neighbours well and to this day they have no idea Saw her for 3 years weekly. Saw mum every 2nd visit lol.

Sort of surprised me as I'm generally very switched on to what's happening around me.

 

[Lucy Lake]

I'm moving house soon anyway, getting away from the mess my ex house mate has made... With a few of my neighbours.When I was on night shift, she would blast the music at ridiculous hours, getting noise complaints from the police, only reason I found out was a random she had over slipped up..

Hey Ginger

Luckily I had already told the real estate I was leaving. I packed up my shit, put it into storage and flew to Perth to work until I go to Europe for the European summer. So, big picture, it doesn't matter in the slightest, but it is pretty shit when people who have no lives try to live vicariously through you in a negative way.

Move on and up, live your life and follow your dreams. People like your neighbour will continue to live a miserable life while you will be moving from strength to strength.

 

[Raye@Langtrees]

Hello Forum Friends!

Lucy here, with a real doozy.

Upon my arrival home to NSW from three weeks away, I set about cleaning my house. My beloved friend, a WL, came around to see me. She told me she had been working privately and had stashed her hooker bag in my laundry (which has an outdoor entrance). I took it out for her and as we talked, the bag started to ring.

I said to her, did you forget to turn your phone off???

We looked at each other with pained expressions and continued on our merry way. When my neighbor arrived home from work in the evening, she knocked on my back door and proceeded to tell me how she found a bag with condoms, lube, a phone and a receipt for a hotel (with my friends name and address on it). I feigned ignorance and had a bit of a chuckle. She said her and her mother had gone through the bag after hearing it ring ALL WEEKEND.

Then she said, "I called the real estate" and I asked her why, my heart sank as I realised we not only have the same real estate but also the same real estate agent. I said perhaps it was a friend of the girl who used to live here.

Needless to say, I was mortified and told her about how the girl who used to live here had her washing machine stolen from the same laundry, and that calling the real estate was a good idea, as the laundry door clearly needed a lock on it. She said "i'm going to call the real estate again". At this time my phone rang and I excused myself to answer it.

I live in a one horse town (although it does protest and call itself a city) and the people here are extremely narrow minded, nosey and tend to gossip. Any advice on coping with the potential fallout of this situation would be greatly appreciated!!!!!!!

One Word hehehe​