Lolita
Bronze Member
Hey Everyone,
I thought I’d start a thread to get some input from both sex workers and clients—because this is something that affects everyone.
It has become very evident that keeping these topics out in the open and having open and honest discussions, collectively, is the best way to have a positive impact / have an impact on the potential damage they can have on us, individually.
I think the one of the coolest things about this forum is that it creates the exact environment that allows clients and sex workers to have these discussions with each other, and we all have the ability to be honest due to the barrier of the internet.
One thing that I think we all need to talk about more openly is health checks - and this is a chance for new workers to learn from the more experienced ones, and for clients who’ve been turned away to share their thoughts.
As a sex workers, we get tested regularly—urine, vaginal swabs, anal swabs, throat swabs, blood tests, the whole works. We’re required to show negative results every three months at Langtrees, so we know we’re some of the safest people to be with. We take health and hygiene very seriously. I believe that clients can use this standard as a way of protecting themselves (just as we do by doing the health checks).
I.e., if your service provider is not asking you to submit to a health check, then maybe you might want to think about whether she should be denied the priviledge of providing services for you... (correct me if I am wrong about this!).
Part of that includes the Health Check—where we visually inspect the client’s genitals for anything unusual. If we notice something, we ask a colleague for a second opinion, just to be sure.
I know this process can be uncomfortable for clients. Common concerns include:
). I found it under the pillow in front of me, and was VERY shocked (to say the least) at how I could have missed that happening. I learned a very important lesson from this - that no sex worker can afford to get complacent or too trusting with their clients, (especially the ones they have not seen before).
That kind of behavior is something that sex workers are never 100% able to prevent or foresee, which is why we have strict protocols designed to prevent the potential outcome of accidental unprotected sex - after all, condoms do have a way of breaking on their own without anyone doing anything wrong. I was lucky, as this man (or rather, this absolute TW*T-ing C**T-bag) didn't pass anything on to me. But just as easily, he could have given me herpes (or worse) and my career would be over, not to mention my personal life severely disrupted, and what I would imagine would be severe psychological trauma and anger issues requiring years to overcome.
We have the right to deny service if something doesn’t feel right, even if we’re not technically qualified to make a diagnosis, but we don't need to be qualified. We don't even need to be more than 60% sure of our suspicions... It is important to mention that when services are withheld for these reasons, it seems only fair that any money paid for that service should be returned - whether a fee or deposit is withheld is up to each establishment/service provider).
But no matter how each person conducts their own business, do not hesitate to speak up about something that looks or seems wrong to you in a booking, whether you are the payer or payee. If you feel like you are taking a risk, maybe don't go ahead with the booking - simply because it's better to be safe than sorry !!!
QUESTIONS :
Clients :
Q: How did you feel when you were turned away?
... Also...
Q: What could the service provider have done differently to reduce the impact of being turned away on you, mentally?
Service Providers :
Q: Have any of you had experiences where someone tried to take off the condom without you noticing?
Let’s share tips so we can watch out for that kind of behavior!
Q: Has anyone had their career cut short, or maybe you have figured out some services you can safely provide and are still working despite having a long-term STD?
Q: Does anyone have any tips for the rest of us to try and prevent the spread of some of these diseases/infections?
Everyone :
Q: Does anyone want to share an experience that has led to them contracting any STD's? Tell us how this has had an impact on your life/marriage/health/mentality/etc.
** There are tailored services that many sex workers offer to people with incurable STD's - if you didn't know this and you would like to know more... maybe someone would like to contribute by telling you about their service menu and you can arrange a meeting ;-)
At the end of the day, when it comes to the necessary protocols that are an integral component in bookings with sex workers, these health checks are annoying and a bit of a mood-killer, yes, but above all they are about prevention of harm—both physical and mental. Clients, if you’ve ever been turned away, I hope this gives some perspective. Service providers, keep up the good work—you’re protecting yourself, and that’s what matters.
Let’s keep the conversation going, share advice, anecdotes, opinions and maybe we might all learn something about the impact of this issue and how we can ALL do better to be more respectful in our efforts to stay as safe and healthy as we can.
Lolita xx
I thought I’d start a thread to get some input from both sex workers and clients—because this is something that affects everyone.
It has become very evident that keeping these topics out in the open and having open and honest discussions, collectively, is the best way to have a positive impact / have an impact on the potential damage they can have on us, individually.
I think the one of the coolest things about this forum is that it creates the exact environment that allows clients and sex workers to have these discussions with each other, and we all have the ability to be honest due to the barrier of the internet.
One thing that I think we all need to talk about more openly is health checks - and this is a chance for new workers to learn from the more experienced ones, and for clients who’ve been turned away to share their thoughts.
As a sex workers, we get tested regularly—urine, vaginal swabs, anal swabs, throat swabs, blood tests, the whole works. We’re required to show negative results every three months at Langtrees, so we know we’re some of the safest people to be with. We take health and hygiene very seriously. I believe that clients can use this standard as a way of protecting themselves (just as we do by doing the health checks).
I.e., if your service provider is not asking you to submit to a health check, then maybe you might want to think about whether she should be denied the priviledge of providing services for you... (correct me if I am wrong about this!).
Part of that includes the Health Check—where we visually inspect the client’s genitals for anything unusual. If we notice something, we ask a colleague for a second opinion, just to be sure.
I know this process can be uncomfortable for clients. Common concerns include:
- "Why do you need someone else to look?"
- "It's just a birthmark, I promise!"
- "I don’t think this is fair, I just want to enjoy myself."
). I found it under the pillow in front of me, and was VERY shocked (to say the least) at how I could have missed that happening. I learned a very important lesson from this - that no sex worker can afford to get complacent or too trusting with their clients, (especially the ones they have not seen before).That kind of behavior is something that sex workers are never 100% able to prevent or foresee, which is why we have strict protocols designed to prevent the potential outcome of accidental unprotected sex - after all, condoms do have a way of breaking on their own without anyone doing anything wrong. I was lucky, as this man (or rather, this absolute TW*T-ing C**T-bag) didn't pass anything on to me. But just as easily, he could have given me herpes (or worse) and my career would be over, not to mention my personal life severely disrupted, and what I would imagine would be severe psychological trauma and anger issues requiring years to overcome.
We have the right to deny service if something doesn’t feel right, even if we’re not technically qualified to make a diagnosis, but we don't need to be qualified. We don't even need to be more than 60% sure of our suspicions... It is important to mention that when services are withheld for these reasons, it seems only fair that any money paid for that service should be returned - whether a fee or deposit is withheld is up to each establishment/service provider).
But no matter how each person conducts their own business, do not hesitate to speak up about something that looks or seems wrong to you in a booking, whether you are the payer or payee. If you feel like you are taking a risk, maybe don't go ahead with the booking - simply because it's better to be safe than sorry !!!
QUESTIONS :
Clients :Q: How did you feel when you were turned away?
- Did you go get checked after?
- And—was the concern about an STD correct or was it a misunderstanding?
... Also...
Q: What could the service provider have done differently to reduce the impact of being turned away on you, mentally?
Service Providers :Q: Have any of you had experiences where someone tried to take off the condom without you noticing?
Let’s share tips so we can watch out for that kind of behavior!
Q: Has anyone had their career cut short, or maybe you have figured out some services you can safely provide and are still working despite having a long-term STD?
Q: Does anyone have any tips for the rest of us to try and prevent the spread of some of these diseases/infections?
Everyone : Q: Does anyone want to share an experience that has led to them contracting any STD's? Tell us how this has had an impact on your life/marriage/health/mentality/etc.
** There are tailored services that many sex workers offer to people with incurable STD's - if you didn't know this and you would like to know more... maybe someone would like to contribute by telling you about their service menu and you can arrange a meeting ;-)
At the end of the day, when it comes to the necessary protocols that are an integral component in bookings with sex workers, these health checks are annoying and a bit of a mood-killer, yes, but above all they are about prevention of harm—both physical and mental. Clients, if you’ve ever been turned away, I hope this gives some perspective. Service providers, keep up the good work—you’re protecting yourself, and that’s what matters.
Let’s keep the conversation going, share advice, anecdotes, opinions and maybe we might all learn something about the impact of this issue and how we can ALL do better to be more respectful in our efforts to stay as safe and healthy as we can.
Lolita xx
